Civility At Work, Part II
Taking tips offered by the Greater Akron Civility Center to counter the rise of incivility and applying them to business has more to do with common sense than it does with business sense. Here are a few more of their suggestions, followed by my italicized comments after each to show how I believe it applies to business.
Show respect. This is a principle most of us learned as kindergarteners, usually right after we had acted disrespectfully. As adults, we likely don’t have a teacher or parent nearby to remind us of this lesson when we’re acting like we might have forgotten.
The outcomes are the same whether we’re five years old or 55. When we treat people with respect, it’s usually returned. Since we’re going to be spending so much of our adult lives interacting with others, it only makes sense to do it respectfully.
Remember that words matter. A quote by Edwin H. Stuart that has occupied space on my office bookshelf for years speaks to this: “Remember, every time you open your mouth to talk, your mind walks out and parades up and down your words.”
Once words have left our mouth, we can’t take them back. We may try to deny them, rationalize or explain them, or when all else fails, ask forgiveness for saying them. But after something has been said, the words have left an impression … good or bad.
Act with integrity. With integrity, you never get a day off. You either act with integrity or you don’t. Are you acting in a way that you would want to show up “above the fold” on the front page of a newspaper? Alright, most people don’t read newspapers anymore, so here’s another way to look at it: Is the way you’re behaving something you’d want your kids or grandchildren to see? If not, then change your behavior.
Appreciate differences. Appreciating opinions that differ from our own can take a lot of energy, especially for business owners who are used to calling the shots and getting their own way.
Bill Prosch, one of my colleagues at Violand Management, stated it well when he said, “Whenever I throw out an idea to this group, I know that it’s either going to get trashed or it’s going to come back to me a whole lot better than when I introduced it.” Bill appreciates how different perspectives and opinions have a way of improving—or at least polishing—an original idea.
Base differing opinions on common facts. This goes back to what I mentioned in Part I about seeking truth. We live in the best educated, best-read civilization in human history. We would do ourselves a big favor if we used the resources we have at our disposal to find common facts before forming our opinions.
All of these suggestions have an impact on the type of culture a company establishes. I’m sometimes asked how to mend a troubled culture. While there are no quick fixes, I feel a great place to start is by having conversations with others in the company, and the more civil these conversations are, the more likely they are to have a positive influence on the company’s culture. This includes conversations between parties who may not agree on much, but who can set aside their personal grievances long enough to have a civil discourse and build something worthwhile together.
